This is a tricky post for me. I probably shouldn’t share this… but I need to lose weight and get healthy, and I am hoping this will give me the kick I need. This post is my starting point. Where I stand today, and what’s going on in my mind.
I have posted before about how overweight I am, and how unhappy I was about it. I also posted about how determined I am to get in shape, fit and healthy. Well I failed, miserably. Every time I get to that “time of the month” I allow myself to slip, and by the end of it I’ve given up totally.
Now the long-awaited “PureGym” has opened near me, and I have turned 26. I have to sort myself out.
The Pros and Cons
The downsides of being this big.
- I dread buying new clothes because I hate how they look on me.
- I avoid people from my past as I’m ashamed of how I look.
- I also dread meeting new people.
- I worry about getting myself physically STUCK in small spaces.
- I ache. I feel physically unfit. More so than ever before.
- I worry I’ll not be able to run and play with Olivia the way she may expect in years to come.
- I spend a lot of money on shitty food – like 3 chocolate bars from the vending machine at 70p a pop.
- It’s shameful and embarrassing to recount the food I have eaten some days.
- The nice clothes don’t fit. Fashionable things aren’t designed for my shape.
- My C-section scar is in the crease where my stomach flops overs (*gags*) and it gets hot and hurts.
Plus sides of being this big
- It’s easy. Requires no self-control or discipline.
- I can eat and enjoy whatever food I like.
- All my current clothes fit.
Fat score = Positives: 3 negatives: 10, so 3-10 = -7
Downsides of getting fit
- It’s hard work
- The gym and associated clothes cost money.
- It takes time and effort to prepare healthy food.
- Loss of my “veg in front of the TV” time every other day.
Plus sides of getting fit
- I will look SO much better.
- I will feel SO much better.
- I will regain my confidence and go out more socially.
- I’ll spend less on piles of crap.
- That smug feeling slim people have as they decline the 2nd cupcake – I’ll have that.
- I will know I can walk into any shop and buy something NICE, that fits and compliments me.
- I may be able to walk in super high heels without my ankles screaming.
- I can take up a sport that I enjoy.
- I’ll be able to join zumba type classes without worrying I’ll die a humiliating death within 5 minutes.
- Massive reduction in the risk of many diseases – inc type 2 diabetes and High blood pressure that my Mum developed in her late 40s.
- I’ll be able to run and skip and jump with Olivia until we both flake out
- Olivia will have less risk of growing up obese and unhealthy.
Fit score = Positives: 12 negatives: 4, so 12-4 = 8
Fat Score -7 vs Fit score 8.
No Brainer really isn’t it? If each disease had a point of its own it’d be through the roof, and Olivia growing up truly happy and healthy would have a few thousand itself.
I’ll be taking myself to the gym every other day once Madam is in bed, and managing my food intake. I’ve started up my thinking slimmer slimpod again. I still don’t know if it works as I never manage to keep it up long enough. This time has to be different.
Now for the tricky bit…
My current measurements and pics.
Taken on 11th June 2012, my 26th Birthday.
Height 5’ 1” Weight 13st 9lb BMI 36.1
Smallest part of Waist 39.5”
Waist band 47”
Thighs – Left 27” Right 27”
Calves – Left 17.5” Right 17.5
Arms – Left 15” Right 15”
The plan is to come back each month and repeat this post, to compare progress. Please feel free to follow me on twitter here and kick me up the backside with some encouragement, and please leave any tips or advice you have below in the comments.